Remember the Coors Party Ball? No?? When the amber-hued globe was pulled from the trunk, the party got 30% more wicked cool. (On the East Coast.)

I’ll be starting a petition on change.org demanding the return of this American symbol — can you even imagine if it were wrapped in the American flag?? CAN YOU?!

Oh, but here’s where this post really starts: Last year, Tanek designed a Total Wine for the good people of Bloomington,

BUT the parents in the small, rural, and extremely religious town of Elmore City, Oklahoma

(aka Minnesota Licensed Beverage Association wouldn’t let it open! (I KNOW!)

And David Trone, president and co-owner of Total Wine, sees the Twin Cities as an underserved market! Isn’t that sad? Underserved… Not on my watch! But this story, much like the aforementioned, has a happy ending. (Phew.) Read all about it in John Ewodt’s article for the Startribune.